My pussy is not your playground.
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
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