sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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