Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
What would I even say at the wedding? "Sorry that I still wouldn't sleep with you after four years of you trying...but hopefully my sister here isn't that stubborn" and give him an awkward pat on the back?
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
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