remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
Randomize
