Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
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