do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
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