Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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