Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
Randomize
