her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
Drunk is not a location!
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
Pooping to opera.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
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