dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
Is it sad or funny that I just bought two pregnancy test at the dollar store to give away to people on New Year's Eve while driving for Uber.
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
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