you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
Randomize
