All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
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Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
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If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize