my sisters under your porch take her home
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize
