I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
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