don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
