after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
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