she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
We need to step in, this can't continue. The guy she went home with last night looked exactly like Count Olaf, right down to the unibrow.
Which version tho, Jim Carrey or Neil Patrick Harris?
THAT DOESN'T FUCKING MATTER, YOU DON'T FUCK COUNT OLAF!!!
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
Randomize
