If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You made a "martini" bagel. Took a bagel dunked it in vodka and put olives in it
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
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