Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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