peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
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