Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
Randomize
