it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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