i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
