Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
the condom got lost in my hair
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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