Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize