You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
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