hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
