like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
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