Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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