Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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