At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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