he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
Randomize
