im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
NoShamevember. You game?
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
Randomize
