No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
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