i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize
