Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
