That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
So for two years my friend Mark has been building a catapult in his basement. Yesterday he realized it's too big to get it out.
You need to give me a reason immediately why he is your friend.
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
Randomize
