If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
Can you bring me the toilet please
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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