if you like me you must not know who I am
508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
our cab driver is having phone sex.
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
