Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
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