maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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