Texts From Last Night

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  (419): View more from Ohio

  "Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.

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  (419): "Morning after" poops are always like, interesting. http://tfl.nu/5eje
  Replies (12) Good night (971) Bad night (2257)
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  (913): View more from Kansas

  My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me

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  (913): My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me http://tfl.nu/wgqk
  Replies (9) Good night (1658) Bad night (788)
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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper

  (952): View more from Minnesota

  Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?

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  (612): he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper (952): Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it? http://tfl.nu/ydx5
  Replies (9) Good night (865) Bad night (3818)
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  (619): View more from California

  reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy

  (1-619): View more from California

  sounds legit

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  (619): reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy (1-619): sounds legit http://tfl.nu/fo9p
  Replies (27) Good night (4228) Bad night (1065)
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  (940): View more from Texas

  She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.

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  (940): She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one. http://tfl.nu/4xsk
  Replies (35) Good night (15576) Bad night (870)
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  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please

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  (202): im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please http://tfl.nu/aagw
  Replies (29) Good night (4363) Bad night (1570)
• Favorite

  (973): View more from New Jersey

  can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters

  (973): View more from New Jersey

  i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet

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  (973): can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters (973): i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet http://tfl.nu/povn
  Replies (11) Good night (2416) Bad night (907)
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  (228): View more from Mississippi

  yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.

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  (228): yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight. http://tfl.nu/g16n
  Replies (10) Good night (3478) Bad night (1608)
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"

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  (215): Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober" http://tfl.nu/vzc2
  Replies (6) Good night (4057) Bad night (802)
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  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.

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  (403): You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark. http://tfl.nu/dx9e
  Replies (16) Good night (2233) Bad night (607)
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  (817): View more from Texas

  Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.

  (214): View more from Texas

  I still make more money.

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  (817): Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions. (214): I still make more money. http://tfl.nu/pibf
  Replies (6) Good night (2471) Bad night (480)
• Favorite

  (307): View more from Wyoming

  A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror

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  (307): A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror http://tfl.nu/ozj2
  Replies (14) Good night (933) Bad night (529)
• Favorite

  (626): View more from California

  I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.

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  (626): I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases. http://tfl.nu/mmj1
  Replies (0) Good night (223) Bad night (356)
• Favorite

  (763): View more from Minnesota

  you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work

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  (763): you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work http://tfl.nu/lqsd
  Replies (1) Good night (625) Bad night (191)
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  (501): View more from Arkansas

  When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening

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  (501): When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening http://tfl.nu/gsvb
  Replies (1) Good night (269) Bad night (409)

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