you sent me 5 happy birthday texts last night. one after the other. spelled differently.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
