wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
Randomize
