Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
Just chased the kids into the backyard with kitchen knives. Best. Babysitters. Ever.
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Randomize
