I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Randomize
