I got chris browned last night
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
God, you're like boner-b-gone
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
Randomize
