so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
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So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
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He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
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