Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
Just realized our kids will one day call us old because we were around when texting came about. I'm sad.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
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Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
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My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
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