It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
only if we run a train.
done.
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
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