'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
Randomize