Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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